Why We Love to Hate Our Fitness Journey
Why We Love to Hate Our Fitness Journey
(And How to Change That for Good!)
You’ve probably heard the saying: "No pain, no gain." But for many Black women embarking on their fitness journey, this belief has often been the root cause of frustration and even injury. It’s a narrative pushed by everyone from personal trainers to well-meaning business coaches. One such business coach I met during the Clubhouse days, with his whole chest, told me that weight loss was what ALL women like me wanted in a health program.
His statement felt dismissive but also misaligned with my personal experience. After years of overexercising to meet rigid height-and-weight standards in the Marine Corps, weight loss was the last thing I wanted.
And, before anyone comes for me, let me state this plainly. If YOU, as an individual, choose to pursue weight loss, that is your personal choice.
What I didn’t appreciate was being told what my fitness goals should be, especially by someone who couldn’t relate to my lived experiences as a Black woman. What I learned from that phase of my life is that fitness should not be synonymous with pain or pushing ourselves to fit into societal molds of what women are “supposed” to look like.
That’s why I knew that Part 3 of our 4-Part Falling Into Wellness series needed to discuss how we approach physical fitness. If you’re a healthcare provider, you’ve likely witnessed Black women's struggles regarding their fitness journeys. Whether battling the misconceptions of what fitness “should” look like or addressing the deeper systemic issues that impact access to supportive fitness resources, our collective journey often begins with more questions than answers.
Therefore, I would be remiss after talking about mental health (Part 1) and nutritional health (Part 2) if I didn’t talk about physical health. Whether we want to admit it or not, we (as practitioners and patients) must explore why we often love to hate our fitness journeys. For the healthcare professionals in the room, we must consider how we can empower Black women to reshape their relationship with fitness. We can prioritize physical activity for its holistic benefits—not just weight loss or fitting into societal standards.
1. We Must Address the Misconception about Fitness
Too often, fitness has been reduced to a vehicle for weight loss, especially in the Black community. Because the fitness industry has caught onto the Black spending power in the United States, it has further reinforced promises of fast weight loss and “transformation” programs. As someone who used to participate in tomfoolery, I can tell you firsthand that the focus on aesthetics undermines fitness's broader, more meaningful benefits, such as mental clarity, cardiovascular health, and disease prevention.
What can you do as a healthcare provider? It’s crucial to emphasize that fitness is not about shrinking ourselves to fit societal norms. Instead, it’s about improving our health outcomes, boosting our energy levels, and, most importantly, preserving our physical and emotional well-being.
What can you do as an individual? Reframing physical activity as a source of empowerment, not punishment, is essential. Exercise is not a means to punish yourself for not upholding societal norms. Forget those norms and embrace who you are becoming internally on your fitness journey - not just externally.
2. We Must Not Ignore The Psychological Toll of Fitness
I wasn’t aware of this until recently, but many Black women face "fitness fatigue," which is a cycle of starting and stopping fitness routines out of frustration or burnout. I experienced this firsthand after running my first (and only) marathon in 2022 and have struggled to enjoy running ever since. Whether you’ve run a marathon or not, it’s essential to recognize that fitness fatigue often stems from societal pressures to conform to specific body standards. When we cannot do so, it can lead to unsustainable exercise routines and disappointment when immediate results aren’t visible.
What can you do as a healthcare provider? Encourage your patients and clients to set achievable goals. Asking questions like: "How would you go about achieving this goal?" or "What about this brings you joy?" helps them honestly consider if they are ready, willing, and able to make this goal a reality. Sometimes, when our parents and clients are honest with themselves, they want the result but are unwilling to go through the process to make that happen. Unpopular opinion - it’s okay if once they know “what it takes,” they choose to do something different.
What can you do as an individual? Rather than focusing on aesthetics focus on how fitness contributes to your overall well-being. Whether that’s increased energy to play with your children or feeling stronger in everyday movements, focusing on benefits beyond aesthetics can help you sustain fitness long-term.
3. We Must Recognize That Fitness Spaces Often Aren’t Designed for Us
I know I will ruffle some feathers with this one, but it needs to be said. The fitness industry wasn’t built with Black women in mind. Whether it’s a lack of representation in marketing or feeling alienated in predominantly white gym spaces, Black women often don’t see themselves reflected in the fitness world. You know this too well if you’ve ever been “the only one” in a fitness space. If you’ve never been “the only one” in a fitness space, you might need to ask yourself, what can you do to change that? As someone who has been the only one, I know that it can lead to feelings of exclusion and discourage Black women from consistently participating in physical activity.
What can you do as a healthcare provider? Help create culturally inclusive fitness environments. This might entail suggesting community-led initiatives, supporting Black-owned fitness studios, and attending virtual classes led by Black instructors. It might seem simple, but ensuring that Black women feel welcome goes a long way.
What can you do as an individual? Seek out gyms, studios, and classes with people you feel comfortable working out with. While there might be limited in-person options, don’t dismiss the power of virtual courses. Since the COVID-19 pandemic, many more culturally competent fitness options have been offered that allow Black women to feel seen, respected, and motivated to engage in physical activity. Because it isn’t locally available doesn’t mean there aren’t viable virtual options that can work for you.
4. We Must Prioritize Injury Prevention and Recovery
Having acquired a few injuries over the years from high school track to my days in the Marine Corps, I am a massive proponent of injury prevention. I learned the hard way that the notion of "no pain, no gain" often leads to a culture of overexertion, resulting in injuries that could have been avoided. As Black women are already disproportionately affected by chronic conditions such as hypertension or arthritis, the last thing they need is to make themselves vulnerable to these injuries. Thus, I’m looking at YOU personal trainers when I say that proper guidance and support must be provided.
What can you do as a healthcare provider? Advocate for injury prevention. I know I could just end there, but I won’t. I mean this with every fiber of my being: We must encourage our patients and clients to listen to their bodies. That means they must learn to recognize signs of strain and prioritize recovery as much as their active routines. Because without rest, there will be no reward.
What can you do as an individual? I know I hinted at my lack of consistency since the marathon, and inadequate recovery is why. I will say that for the person who needs to hear it, rest is your birthright. As much as you want to pursue your fitness goals, you must be as passionate about rest as exercise. It must be about balance, not extremes, to avoid burnout and hate fitness.
5. We Must See Fitness as Self-Preservation, Not Self-Punishment
I’ve been beating the same old drum today, but let me state it plainly. Fitness doesn’t have to be something we grow to hate—it can be an act of self-preservation. This is especially vital for Black women who experience systemic racism and gender bias in healthcare settings. Instead of seeing movement as something we HAVE to do, it can be a source of joy that we GET to do to release tension and reclaim agency over our health.
What can you do as a healthcare provider? Once again, I’m looking at my trainers in the room because you have more agency here than you might realize. You must promote fitness as a form of self-care, not self-punishment. You’re THE expert, and your clients will follow suit based on the example that YOU set for them. Make sure it’s an example that empowers them.
What can you do as an individual? I know I’ve been picking on the personal trainers, who I love, by the way, today. In all seriousness, I don’t want you, as a patient or client, to ignore your responsibility to reframe your fitness journey. If you allow it, fitness can be an opportunity to honor your body, celebrate your potential, and practice self-compassion. Even if you have a trainer or provider tooting the horn of self-punishment, you still take ownership of your decision to choose self-preservation instead.
I know we covered a lot today, and you’ve probably noticed that this is one topic I’m very passionate about. At the core of this conversation lies a powerful truth: fitness is about so much more than physical appearance.
For Black women, fitness can and should be a pathway to healing, empowerment, and joy. As a healthcare provider, you can guide them in reshaping this journey, making it one they can love instead of one they dread. By centering equity, encouragement, and education in your approach, you can create spaces where Black women feel empowered to engage in fitness that enhances their physical and emotional well-being.
Ready to continue this conversation and learn how you can further support your patients' and clients' health journeys? Subscribe to the EBWH community newsletter to hear more about part 4 of our 4-part "Falling Into Wellness" series, where we’ll dive into financial health—because wellness extends far beyond the gym.